Ninjas vs FAIM

As everyone seems to know now, I’m in the roller derby team. With roller derby being so new, we need funds to get us going, so Foxy von Fistburger organised for us to have the rink on the first Saturday of every month. It soon became an idea to have live bands play while punters skate around the rink. I laughed when my name was nominated to find the bands to play. I somehow didn’t think it was so funny when I ended up with the job of derby band liaison bitch.

For the first night off the ground, we had punk night (surprise surprise). The two bands who were playing were Injured Ninja and The F.A.I.M! Project. Down at derby, we knew that we were paying the bands bugger all to play but we could bring them a damn huge crowd, so we went to play media whores down at the local street press office. We were doing well, but I knew that we’d struggle to get the 150 that we’d told the bands that we’d get.

So the bands started doing their own promo, which is when I started realising how different the two bands were. Injured Ninja have toured internationally, finding themselves in Japan thanks to some nice government grants. These 4 guys do everything by the book from band liaisons to media promotion. A week before the show, I found out that Injured Ninja had got themselves on RTRfm (the local radio station) to plug the show. Wow, go boys!

In stark contrast, The F.A.I.M! Project do things their way or not at all. They rock up to sign their band agreements drunk from an afternoon’s drinking; signing massive waivers covering everything from their band payment to their equipment, even their lives whilst making bawdy jokes and playing footsies under the fucking table. But to top things of, they don’t have government grants, airplay on the radio or an ironing board full of fancy pedals, they do things the F.A.I.M! Project way. They get their press by having Noah do his infamous acrobatics set down at a local pub which shall remain unnamed which found the band getting more press than any radio show ever got Injured Ninja. It’s amazing what you can achieve with a couple of fridge-sized bouncers and a simple lighting rig.

But, I guess getting kicked off stage after just 3 songs is just the new black of band publicity.